Aaron David McCafferty

On the 10th April 2005, my husband & I arrived at our local maternity hospital - I was full-term & in early labour with our first child. We were full of excitement and hope with a little trepidation - as with any first time parents. The big day was here and our life was about to change forever!

I continued with a slow moving labour for the next 17 hours, when at 19:10 the foetal heart monitor showed our babies heartbeat dropping below 110bpm. I was transferred to threatre, put to sleep & our baby was delivered by caeserean section at 20:05. Later I awoke from the anaesthetic to the sound of my husband crying and through his tears he managed to tell me that we had had a baby boy but that he had died. I think I went into to shock, I felt as if it wasn't me people were talking to, although physically in the room, I could see the events unfold as though I was a spectator - it didnt feel as if it was my baby that had died. It took a few hours to come round and then reality & despair took hold.

I decided to attend SANDS because I was looking for a way to ease our pain and I hoped that they would have the answer. What I found was support, although we were lucky enough to have one another and close family & friends. At SANDS, I met people who understood that we were new parents , only our sleepless nights were caused by the silence. I spoke of our broken hearts & how my arms ached from the weight of their emptiness, as Aaron was a stillborn baby.

At Sands I meet other mums Amber & Patricia, our babies were born within a few months of each other and as a result of attending SANDS we developed a bond and a friendship that has continued to help us deal with our loss and with our subsequent pregnancies. We have all been lucky to add to our families, Aaron now has two little sisters Isla & Lily, Willow has big sister Anna, little sister Ava and little brother Sonny, Christopher a little brother Sean.

Aaron, Willow & Christopher will always be part of our families and we miss them everyday. We have a heart full of love for the child we didn't have the privilege to watch grow. And we hold a little tighter to the ones we do.....

You can hear me tell my story at the Remembrance service 2006, click on this link & press play.

This was written by Angela McCafferty - April 2007. Updated Jan 2009.